“he thought he saw God sitting upon his throne, surrounded with numberless concourses of angels in the attitude of singing and praising their God.” (RE 1 Nephi 1:3, LDS 1 Nephi 1:8)
”And I also cast my eyes around about and beheld, on the other side of the river of water, a great and spacious building. And it stood as it were in the air, high above the earth. And it was filled with people, both old and young, both male and female, and their manner of dress was exceeding fine; and they were in the attitude of mocking and pointing their fingers…” (RE 1 Nephi 2:11, LDS 1 Nephi 8:26-27)
I recently noticed these two attitudes. The one is an attitude of singing and praising. The other is an attitude of mocking and pointing fingers at others. What really stood out to me was this second attitude. Where I first noticed it was in myself. It was after I noticed it that I was reminded of this verse. Have I been mocking and pointing my finger at people humbly trying to follow Jesus? I certainly would hope not. In my view, it’s been people that I feel have been mocking me for believing. What I see now, that I didn’t really appreciate before, is that it doesn’t really matter who I may be pointing at or mocking. It’s the attitude that’s really so wrong. When I have an attitude of mocking someone or pointing my finger at others, it really doesn’t feel good inside. In fact, I may be mocking or pointing my finger because I feel really hurt, particularly by those I’m mocking or pointing my finger at. The truth is, this attitude doesn’t help. They aren’t really benefited by my attitude being like that and neither am I.
In contrast to this attitude of mocking and finger pointing, there is another attitude by a completely different group of people. The attitude on display by this group of people is an attitude of singing praises. It’s not just singing any song. It’s the attitude of those singing and what they are saying that is so different. They may not even be actually singing that well, but they have an attitude that is full of praise and gratitude. This group seems a lot happier than the former group.
I find it a lot more natural to have the attitude of mocking and finger pointing. But it doesn’t feel good. Recently I’ve been affected by some things at a very core level. I’ve been hurt deeply by what’s been done. But I can’t change any of it. What’s been done, has been done. Even though I may do a decent job of keeping most of it to myself, I find that even if I am alone with an attitude of mocking and pointing my finger, it still doesn’t feel good. There’s really no amount of mocking or finger pointing that will help. It makes things worse. The more I do it, even alone, the harder it is to get rid of. It doesn’t seem to matter that nobody sees me. I still feel bad. Then, the more I feel bad, the more I tend to do it. It spirals downward.
I have found something that does help. It’s trying to have the other attitude. It’s trying to be grateful. I’ve found it helps me to repeat as many things as I can think of that I am grateful for, particularly when I feel really hurt inside. I try saying as many things as I can think of that I can be grateful for. “thank you for breath, thank you for smell, thank you for touch, thank you for taste, thank you for sight, thank you for hearing, thank you for life, thank you for mercy, thank you for forgiveness, thank you for noticing me, thank you for seeing my need, thank you for judging me kindly, thank you for meekness, thank you for not taking advantage of my weakness, thank you for teaching me, thank you for challenging me, thank you for helping me grow, thank you for understanding me, thank you for sleep, thank you for health, thank you for beauty, thank you for work, thank you for happiness … “ Just saying any little thing I can think of and continue with that line of thought, really does help.
Several times, I’ve gone on with this for an hour or more. I don’t say that to brag. It’s because I’m driven there by pain and hurting so much and wanting to feel different from what is going on inside. The attitude of singing praises, is the opposite attitude of what comes naturally but it’s the attitude that I want. I’m trying to be content with what has been given to me, even if that includes pain. I find that gratitude helps. An attitude of praising is a much better attitude to have.